Natalie arrived in Camphill a confused, scared fifteen year-old, defensive and aggressive when interacting with the new environment around her. She found things very difficult once her belongings were unpacked and it was time for her parents to leave. New myself, I shared some of these overwhelming feelings. However, while I had consciously decided to live in Camphill, Natalie had not chosen to come and didn't have a solid understanding as to where she was, why she was here, or who I and the others in the house and village were.

Natalie was unaccustomed to our life here, finding our daily routines bewildering. Natalie doesn't communicate verbally. She found other ways to express indignation and displeasure for her new predicament: pinching, grabbing, pulling my hair, etc. Every task was a challenge for us both - from giving her a shower and getting dressed to eating lunch properly.

I yearned to know how to reach her, help her feel safe and understand the new world around her. I talked to Natalie, explaining the what, where and why behind every part of our day so she would feel more comfortable and secure. I attempted to teach her a few simple signs. Despite my efforts, the first months were trying for both of us. Physically and emotionally I was exhausted by the end of each day. I often found myself struggling to hold back the tears and battling with thoughts of giving up and returning home.

Gradually something changed between Natalie and me. She became more cooperative, her aggressive behavior decreased, and she began talking to us -in her own language comprised of unique sounds. Her attempt to communicate was exciting, and her compliance with our routine was relieving. The scared child who refused to walk to school was gone, replaced by a beautiful young woman who would run while laughing. She no longer would grab any food within reach and stuff it into her mouth, but would ask for "more" using her hands while at the table.

Over Christmas break, I realized how much I love Natalie. I missed her laugh and seeing her everyday. When I met Natalie to bring her back to school, she ran up and hugged me - a far cry from the early days when I lost hair by the handful - and she began talking animatedly to me in her own language. This hug set the tone for our new year in Camphill, and I have been constantly amazed by the progress we have both made.

Natalie now communicates with five basic signs - more, please, thank you, help and bathroom. Her garbled speech sounds increasingly like words we can understand. Natalie now helps around the house and has learned to start a load of laundry almost independently. She joins others in her dorm to work on a project - whether cleaning their room or gardening outside. I am happy that I have been able to reach Natalie and that she has come to realize her own potential.

Seminar Project: Making Felt Balls
Naomi Fairclough, Triform Camphill Community
Scotland

Naomi Fairclough, a coworker from the Scotland, participated in the first year of a three year seminar on Social Therapy while at the Triform Camphill Community. Part of the first year of the seminar includes an independent project working with someone on a particular project and culminates in a written paper and oral presentation. Naomi chose to work with Peter, a young man with Down syndrome and many special needs.

When I first heard about a project for seminar, I instantly thought I would like to do it with Peter.* For the last year I worked two days a week with Peter so it made sense to combine that time with our project.

Now I just had to work out what we would do. I wanted to learn some kind of crafty thing - since I'm not at all talented. On our first day in the weavery, Sabine, the weavery instructor, dragged out a huge box filled with disgusting dirty wool! Sabine merrily told us we could do something with this but first we would have to clean it. We sat down together and began this task - one I thought we'd never get through!

At first things were a little bit difficult for both of us. Peter is not used to focusing on one task for long periods of time - it is often difficult to keep him moving at the same pace as everyone else. I found it difficult because I wanted this project to work and it seemed to be going so slow. I wondered if it would actually develop into anything. We had to get used to each other and our new work environment. Before we were in the garden or on the farm - so being inside felt confined and restricted. Peter is a very noisy, loud person so it was difficult to keep him calm - especially with so many people around; it was often too much of a distraction for him and he would upset the more sensitive members of the work place and we ended up going for a walk. For me it helped; having to do this meant I had to slow down and as a result Peter and I started to get along better. He didn't feel rushed and somehow I didn't feel slowed!

When Sabine gave us all this wool to work with I did wonder what on earth we were going to do with it. We picked at the wool for quite some time without an actual end result in mind. Peter is always twiddling with strings, so it was a nice trade - he worked with the wool in the same way he does strings and it worked.

We decide to make felt balls for the speech and movement class. That way, it would have a use after we finished and Peter could see what he accomplished. After we picked a mountain of wool, I asked Sabine how to dye it - just to make it more interesting! With many different colors, we started. Peter was always clear on what color he wanted. Measuring of quantities was too difficult for Peter, so I did that. While the wool was 'cooking' he would stir it.

After it dried, the wool looked matted and yucky! We began to card it - first using the hand carders (which looked like huge hair brushes), and then Sabine gave us a bigger carder that the wool is fed into and turned with a handle. I did the feeding and Peter turned the wheel, it was something he got without me showing him. Next we had to learn how to make the felt balls! Between having never done this before and being completely untalented, I felt daunted at the prospect. Peter was not able to cup his hand into the desired shape. Instead we ended up with flat, wet wool! I tried another technique - I would start the ball and Peter could smooth and round it with his fingers, but that didn't work. After a few attempts, I resigned myself to the fact that this was part of the project that Peter would not be able to do. Since each ball required so much wool, he continued with cleaning and carding while I put the balls together.

I feel I learned more from Peter than he did from me. Before I just saw Peter as this cute, mischievous little guy. I never paid attention to what he was shouting about. Working so close with Peter and having a goal was probably the best thing I could have done. I mean, our project is a success in that the felt balls will be used, but for me it is a success because I feel I have a bond with Peter - one that gives me a bit more understanding of him. When he makes one of his high-pitched squeals (I tried once to imitate it - which he found pretty amusing) but I felt it was a liberating thing. I wasn't trying to sound nice; it was more about just making myself heard. Which I think is what Peter is doing.

When we finished making all the felt balls I handed them to him because I wanted to take a picture of him holding them, he smiled, said 'nice' and then dropped them all over the floor!

* Name has been changed to protect privacy.